Facebook should be banned.
It’s been blamed for damaging relationships, costing people their jobs, and now for almost ruining my life.
Let me explain.
My 18-year-old daughter has taught both of her grandmothers how to get on Facebook. I tried to warn her – Do you really want Grandma and Nana on Facebook? But she wouldn’t listen and now it’s come back to bite…
me, of course.
The other day I got a phone call from my mother.
After five minutes of small talk, she got to the real reason for her phone call.
She was concerned about her granddaughter. And I quote, “I’m a little concerned about your daughter. According to Facebook, she had five guys at the pool yesterday.”
I’m not sure what she said next, because I immediately went into a dissociative state—you know, the outer body experience where you watch yourself in a very stressful event. Usually, it’s some sort of life or death situation like a car accident or major surgery.
Or as in my case the moment you discover your daughter might not be studying for that biology exam like you think.
When I rejoined the conversation and my actual body I said, “A…..she was referring to noticing five guys at the hotel pool when we were in Charleston last weekend.”
Yeah, that’s it.
My mother seemed satisfied. And while she began giving me the updates on the extended family, I logged onto Facebook to take a look myself.
And there it was… Good day so far – had five guys at the pool tanning then work at 3.
Once my heart rate returned to normal I noticed the date on her post and remembered she indeed had five guys –
as in Five Guys Burgers and Fries.
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times – punctuation is important! One lousy comma and a little capitalization could have prevented this near catastrophe.
Whew, I really dodged a bullet this time.
But there’s always the next post…
Have any Facebook stories you’d like to share? I’d love to hear them!